When your friend gets engaged


You may know what this post is about, the clue is in the title. Let’s start from the top.

I have known my best friends since primary school, there are 7 of us including myself and my twin sister. I (in my cool younger age) named us ‘The Possy’ and since then it has stuck. We were known as the ‘good girls’ at school, not ones to mess around, weren’t too into boys in our younger years, underage drinking wasn’t our interest, we focused on work and I guess it paid off. The possy consists of teachers, solicitors, lawyers, motivational coaches and web developers, not bad hey?

We have gone through stages of our lives where we get together and discuss the next chapter in our lives. Starting secondary school, GCSES, Prom, A-Levels, getting into university, graduating, starting our careers. As we have all ticked these off our list, the discussion of proposals and engagements arises. (We are girls after all). Many conversations of who will be the first to get engaged, who would have what type of wedding, ceremonies, traditions and so on. It’s exciting! Since starting Secret Wedding Blog - it’s even more exciting.


After a weekend away in the woods, I had no signal, and actually enjoyed being off my phone for a while. It was only late Sunday night until I was able to check my emails, facebook, twitter, Whatsapp etc. The possy group had a lot of notifications and scrolling back to the top, we received the news. Our friend had put ‘So (boyfriends’ name) asked me a question today and I said yes’ and sent us an image of a beautiful engagement ring!

I can honestly say I burst into tears when I read the news. I was SO happy! The FIRST of our group of girls to get engaged, we had talked about it for years and it had finally started. I was messaging back like mad, seeing everyone else’s reactions was also so good to see because we all shared the experience together! As we all have such busy jobs, it is so difficult to get us altogether, it happens once or twice a year, sadly not enough!

The way my friend announced her engagement was just perfect in my opinion. She told us first before she or her boyfriend announced it online. I couldn’t agree with this anymore. Announcing your engagement on facebook before telling your close family and friends can cause an uproar. They may be upset or offended that they had to find out the same time as everyone else; when they thought they would be one of the first to know.Happiness

When your friend gets engaged, my advice would be (especially for females) - do not compare your relationship to the one that has just been engaged. EVERY couple and their love stories are different, different circumstances i.e. career, location, finances, family, timing all differ. It can be easy to think ‘Oh I’m not engaged, I wish I was engaged’, but at the end of the day it’s not about you. It is about your friend’s engagement. No-one wants to hear about why you’re not engaged when they want to hear about the engaged friend. Let her have her moment and be SUPER HAPPY! This reminds me of the episode of Friends where Monica thinks Rachel is stealing her thunder, that may be more relatable! I have nothing but happiness and excitement at this announcement, especially as I very much approve of her finance!

Congratulations to the newly engaged couple and I cannot wait to go through your wedding journey with you! xoxo

2 Comments When your friend gets engaged

  1. Emma

    We chose to announce it on Facebook - it just suited our circumstances. We were away in Disney World, and after a quick phone call to our parents (where I asked my Dad to let family know), we spent a few hours in the Disney bubble, being congratulated every few moments. I sent pictures to our closest friends, using iMessage, then a few hours later announced it on Facebook/Instagram.

    I think each couple finds what works for them. With the time difference, and cost of international calls, I would have found it difficult to let everyone know personally.

    1. Raj Dharar

      Thanks for sharing your own experience Emma. I agree with the with you on that one with your circumstances, but I think you did it the right way. And a proposal in Disney Land, that sounds like the most magical experience ever!


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