Being raised in a non-Asian area has been fun for myself and the family. I feel I always get to experience the best of both worlds. The other night, I got talking to Mark’s mum. Being a 60 something White northern lady, she had never attended an Indian wedding. Her oldest son and daughter had traditional Christian weddings, which she has always been familiar with.
She got talking to me and mentioned that her hairdresser had attended an Indian wedding and said how amazing it was. I couldn’t deny it, Indian weddings, have always been incredible to me. Instead of watching the film we put on, I ended up getting out my iPad mini and began showing her weddings from Secret Wedding Blog (SWB).
I explained the mendhi (henna) nights and why it happens, and how long the bride has to keep it on for. As well as other ladies having theirs done. Her face lit up, she asked: “Does that mean I can have it done?”
So cute, bless her. Of course, I exclaimed! She was ever so excited.
Whilst showing her the bridal attires from the real weddings on SWB, she kept saying over and over how beautiful they are. From their hair and make up, to the jewellery and the actual outfit. It was interesting that she asked if it always had to be red, the Sikh brides wore; I mentioned how I published a blog post on the rise of the pink asian bridal wear.
We were nattering for ages. When discussing how the bride and groom walk round the Guru Granth Sahib four times, the bride is being passed by her brothers. This includes cousins. I have seen this many times at my own female cousins weddings (My cousin is actually in the photos of this blog post!) I expressed how I’d always imagine my own wedding and that I’d have about 20 brothers! I suddenly broke down in tears. My cousin Bobby, who passed away at the age of 21 last year, wouldn’t be there. Still a very hard concept to digest. He was my second cousin, but Asian families are so large, that we call our cousins brothers and sisters.
Although Mark’s mum didn’t know anything about Sikh weddings, I left her with enough knowledge and excitement that she was getting excited about my own wedding! It did give me a sense of pride, that I was able to use Secret Wedding Blog to give her an insight of how my family and culture do weddings.
She was able to see my side of how I felt about the wedding guest list. I mentioned that I had always been to the ceremony and reception, because Indian weddings are usually a lavish affair with hundreds of people. It would be rude to attend the reception and not the ceremony. Non Asian weddings are smaller and divided to cut the cost. There are definitely pros and cons for both types of weddings, which I won’t go into now, but she understood it from my point of view. If cost wasn’t a factor, I’d want everyone there for ceremony and reception. For a multicultural wedding, it is still being decided how to blend both cultures for the wedding. It will be unfolded when the time arises!
So the idea of this post was a personal post to express how happy I am that SWB is used to explain and get ideas about Sikh weddings. This is why I aim to keep blogging about all types of weddings ranging from culture to religion to location and mainly the combination of both. Multicultural, fusion weddings so you can get to see the best of both worlds.
*Photography is of my cousin on her wedding day
Have you also had to share and explain how weddings of your own culture to those who know nothing about it? If so, let me know below!